In his “A Brief Introduction to the Study of Awkwardness”, Adam Kotsko talks about how awkwardness is inescapable, pervasive and follows us everywhere: we encounter awkward situations in our everyday life and we always try to avoid it if we cannot control it.
Kotsko also says that “on weekends and holidays we must deal with the awkwardness of family gatherings, where people united by blood kinship find they can’t exchange even the most innocuous opinions without risking tension” (p. 3): there are many remarkable awkward dinner scenes in the history of film but the first one that came to my mind and that fits Kotskos’s thesis best, in my opinion, is the one in Shrek 2 (2004, dir. Andrew Adamson, Kelly Asbury and Conrad Vernon).
The scene takes place in the castle of the Kingdom of Far Far Away: as every dinner scene where the main character meets their significant other’s parents, this scene is pretty awkward and full of tension, especially between Shrek and Fiona’s father, King Harold. As Kotsko says, “we are only able to identify someone as awkward, however, because the person – or, in this case, the ogre – does something that is inappropriate for a given context” (p. 6): that is what happens with Shrek when he tries to eat dinner using his hands instead of cutlery.
What happens next is what makes the whole scene even funnier and more awkward: when Shrek actually tries to eat the soup using a spoon, Fiona looks over at him hinting that he is supposed to put his hands on the plate, as the Queen and the King are doing. This further proves that Shrek does not fit in and, as Kotsko says regarding awkward individuals, has a “particular difficulty relating to social context” (p. 6): at first he acts as he normally would do at home but then, when he tries to follow social norms, he fails miserably.
This is a really great example! I think it is an especially funny example of awkwardness because
it’s one that most people would find awkward in their everyday lives, and the relatability generates humour for the audience. I think the complete obliviousness of donkey in this scene in contrast to everyone else’s clear discomfort also makes it completely funny as his attitude generates even more tension.
I think it’s interesting how dinnertime conversations make awkwardness thrive. In most instances, it has a lot to do with forced conversations, trying to maintain social decorum and presenting a certain “good” image of yourself. Both in the company of family and unknown persons, awkwardness has a lot of potential to build.
This is a really solid example! It truly highlights the dinner example that Kotsko was getting across. I think its interesting that it seems like the situation was already awkward before anyone did anything, mostly because of the shock that Shrek is an ogre and the king frowns upon that. Donkey’s role in this scene is also funny because not only is he oblivious to the discomfort felt in the room, but he seems to be fifth-wheeling at this important family dinner, oblivious to that fact as well. Shrek’s poor table manners and the King’s obvious displeasurement with Shrek being there all serve to make this scene awkward.